Some days I am full of hope about so many things that might become reality. A new home to live in, one we can make our own and love and settle down in. A move going smoothly. A new type of job training - in fact, TWO new types of job training! New friendships growing closer. Old friendships continuing, being revitalized. New habits about eating and exercising, not just for me, but for the whole family. A new sense of self-worth & self-esteem. More financial stability. Continued closeness and time with family. 

And oh, when I reach the end of these days? I realize that it is exhausting to be so hopeful. It is exhausting! I had temporarily gotten used to being quietly sad, resigned to lack of fulfillment. (This is much less draining.)

Comments

[Kathy C.]

Wait, what? Have I missed some thing??

[Jessamyn]

I'm not sure what you think you missed, but I doubt if you've missed anything. Some days I'm hopeful about lots of things that might happen in the future, that's all. It's tiring. :)

[Kathy C.]

I see, now I understand. I thought you meant you all had another move in the works, possibly relocating to another city. I just wasn't sure. And, yes, it is tiring, isn't it. I really know what you're saying.

[Jessamyn]

As for that - yes, we do have another move in the works. We're renting the house we're in and the landlord won't renew our lease when it's up on June 30th. We're not leaving town, but we do have to move, and I dread it. And thanks, Kathy.

[Sue]

I loved reading that you're hopeful! And I'm so glad nice things are happening to you and your family, Jessamyn. I have enjoyed your blog for many years and you've given your readers so much through your amazing, thoughtful writing that I'm glad to see it coming back to you manyfold.

Heartiest congratulations on the new house, and thanks for posting the renovation pictures. There's nothing more fun than seeing a house being transformed by its new owners. Especially when all that hard work is being done by someone else! ;^)